Uninvited Guests


I was on the patio a few days ago, reveling in the warm sunshine while I was watering the potted plants.  The blank, halfwit expression I wear while doing something so mundane disappeared when I realized I was staring at a skunk about 3 feet away from me and turned into panic.   I changed my plans for watering the big pot he was hanging around in and backed away into the house.

For the rest of the day, the skunk strutted around the patio as I watched him through the windows.  Eventually Saki joined me and instead of assuming some fierce tiger-like pose. ready to pounce if I would give him the chance, he sat there studying the skunk like it was some not-very-interesting TV.  Saki is strictly and indoor cat, so I’m not sure he understands the outside actually exists.  He got bored and wanted me to scratch his chin.


Saki’s idea of vermin control

Then two nights ago, I opened the door to the downstairs bathroom (which I hardly ever use) and saw a largish rat perched on the edge of the toilet.  Was he contemplating suicide?  We’ll never know because I screamed like a little girl and slammed the door shut.


So today we have the rodent guy out to rain death down upon them.  Or at least some kind of trap.  He and I took a tour around the outside of my house while he pointed out all the gaps and holes in the structure which apparently turn my home into some kind of Rodent Marriott.   Come on in guys, welcome!


About mrpeenee

A former bon vivant and terror of a number of New Orleans bars in the mad, gay 1980s, I'm now quietly retired and widowed in San Francisco. I have a crooked nose due to an unfortunate Frisbee accident.

17 responses »

  1. We have a skunk who resides at times in the copse next to our building – most piquant some mornings. The damn Yorkie has no idea what it is, of course (being Belgian by way of the Sandlands) and always wants to go charging off into the underbrush in search of the origin of the smell.

    A friend in Palm Springs had one show up in their garden this week – must be the season…


  2. Can you imagine if the rat came out your toilet while you was snapping a length off? *shudders* People keep skunks as pets over here and can fetch over £500


  3. Rat btw tastes a bit like rabbit, as I was told by men who have eaten it. There is a saying (“Kopf ab, Schwanz ab, Has’ !”/ what translates to: cut off the head and the tail, it will look like rabbit) – hence the Chinese always insist that the roast comes to the table in one piece ,,, With a little cream sauce anything will go down well.

    Besides that I opt for full chemical warfare : Kill the basteds ! And turn Yer home into a fortress.


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