While I was all too aware of my father’s many weaknesses, he did have a number of physical traits I wouldn’t have minded inheriting, but which passed me completely by. Smooth, clear, dark olive skin that had no trouble tanning and thick, lustrous hair that refused to recede and which didn’t even start turning gray until he was in his ’70s; did I get any of that good stuff? Oh no. But sinuses that run year-round down the backs of our throats? That, I got. And I got it in spades.
My brother Ed and I sympathize with each other about this snot gene. I believe my grandmother had it too and dealt with it with a series of delicate lady-like coughs, ahem. This constant trickle down my throat is annoying year round, but when allergies descend, it turns maddening.
So I took my snotty self on off to an ENT doctor. He listened and looked and stuck some intrusive instruments up my nose and then declared that I have acid reflux.
What? It was like taking your broken arm in and being told you have the mumps. Maybe, but what do the two have to do with each other? He claimed he made this diagnosis pretty much every day. I don’t know if that means it’s common or if he just likes the diagnosis. Apparently, the irritation of your esophagus is what makes you cough. He swore there was nothing unusual about my nose or sinuses.
Of course this means more trips to more doctors including an endoscopy and an allergy test. It’s simply more evidence that my body parts are conspiring against me.
Men I would like to introduce to my body parts:
Guys this week are vintage meat, mostly from Colt Studios glory days of the 80s and 90s and Kristen Bjorn Studio from the same era. I’m just a sentimental fool. This is J. D. Amos
The massive Pete Kuzak.
The unnecessarily beautiful Doug Perry. Be still my heart.
Here we have Max Venziano batting for the Kristen Bjorn boys.
Lastly, one of my all time favorites, Robert Machado.