In Which We Jump Ahead and Wonder About Pizza Boys

Standard

I know no one likes changing time twice a year, so there’s no need to add my whine to all that clamor, but I will chime in to the subsection that gripes about the purpose of the whole fucketry. Isn’t it odd that we all go along grudgingly with it, but none of us know why? I remember some confusing explanation from when I was young, something about more sun for farmers. Fuck them. Why should my time be upended just because they won’t set their alarm clocks? Anyway, if you look that up now, all you find is a bunch of articles saying that’s not true, it’s just an urban myth and then nattering along about the REAL reason, although none of the articles agree about what that might be. Instead they sprout gibberish about economists diddling, socialists interfering, New Deal fantasies, to make more use of sunlight; all sorts of late night dorm room pontificating. My favorite is the one that just says “It was the Germans.” Like that explains everything.

Anyway. If you didn’t change your clock last night, do it now unless you want to be late to brunch.

I had a special request from Mikey, over at Chaturbate, for a themed naked guy segment featuring that long-time pornography staple, the pizza delivery boy. I was willing to go along with Mikey, even though a google for “pizza boy naked porn” turned up some pretty scary looking skanks. Seems like such classic starring role would generate at least some humpy pepperoni slingers, but no. Even going back and adding the term “gay” didn’t help the results much. Herein, the picks of a not-very-impressive litter. It’s all mikey’s fault.

This is world famous nekkid boy, Reno Gold. Don’t let this fool you into getting your hopes up, the guy quality is all downhill from here.

OK, he’s not bad, and the pizza jimjams are amusing. Also the sombrero in the background is a nice touch.

Eagle eyed readers will note this is not exactly “delivery” since the setting is inside a pizza joint. I’m telling you, there wasn’t much to work with.

OK, so an entire movie based on the theme, but I couldn’t chase down any individual shots from it, which is a shame considering the high quality feathered porn hair dos apparently included.

A shame about the stupid aprons.

Some of the results require a leap of faith that somehow they had anything to do with pizza delivery. Like this one; it could be just any old run-of-the-mill blow job.

So I ran out of gay results. Plus, why are men in straight porn so painfully homely?

About mrpeenee

A former bon vivant and terror of a number of New Orleans bars in the mad, gay 1980s, I'm now quietly retired and widowed in San Francisco. I have a crooked nose due to an unfortunate Frisbee accident.

11 responses »

  1. I remember reading something about there being fewer road traffic accidents during lighter mornings – or was it evenings? So perhaps that’s why the clocks are still changed?
    It may also explain why there’s a dearth of hot pizza delivery boys – they’ve been involved in fatal, or at least crippling RTAs on a dark evening, preventing them from getting to their destination and filling a hungry hole?

    Like

  2. I love pizza with delivery boy’s special sauce. I once made a pizza base crust using cauliflower, I don’t recommend it stank the house out for days afterwards.

    Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s