In Which We Are Reminded, Yet Again, That We Are Old


Our story so far: in the last post you might remember I was discussing (I was not whining. Shut up.) that my big toe hurt and was swollen and red, but that I had no memory of stubbing it. I may have also been pointing out what a brave little choo choo I was being about the whole thing and I was not whining.

Most of the comments on this site lean toward insightful evaluations of the naked manpussy on display, but sometimes my readers will come across with all sorts of helpful tips. They’ll have recipes, or recommendations of things to read, or will come up with the name of a pornstar I was missing. In this case, commenter joeinct noted my symptoms and said “girl you got gout.” Or words to that effect. And he was quite correct; I do got gout. I’m very grateful for his perspicacity, I certainly would never have come up with that diagnosis on my own.

mrpeenee thanks joeinct

Armed with this insight and with the results from Dr Google, I dropped by my own doctor’s office yesterday and rolled out my suspicion that I had what is typically seen as an affliction out of a Dickens novel. The doctor listened to me and then said “Huh, yeah I guess you got gout.”

I could have done with a little more certainty on her part or at least with her being more impressed, but it can be hard to test for gout and you don’t treat it until It gets more serious than my case. Until that happens, there’s not much to do other than glare at my big toe for being a traitor and wonder what other geriatric thrill ride is in store for us.

Examples of manpussy I was talking about earlier:

It’s al about the texture.

Love them big floppy ones.

Phillipe Soulier, one of our on-going favorites.

A sculptural beauty.

It’s going to be a bumpy night.

Jay Tee, cause we need more ass around here, and who has more ass than him?

About mrpeenee

A former bon vivant and terror of a number of New Orleans bars in the mad, gay 1980s, I'm now quietly retired and widowed in San Francisco. I have a crooked nose due to an unfortunate Frisbee accident.

8 responses »

  1. I’m very glad you got diagnosed! I do hope it clears quickly. I don’t like to think of you out there suffering. I also feel guilty that my response to your plight was me, Me, ME!

    Is gout still a rich person’s ailment?


  2. Well, I’m glad you have a doctor who is so certain?!?!?!?! I have a friend with gout..and the only time it seems to flare up is if he eats or drinks certain things. Lucky for you, man pussy isn’t on the list to set it off.


  3. Yes, your doctor should have been more impressed and she should have told you how to ease the pain. She should also be thankful that she’s not a veterinarian — their patients bite.


  4. Oh my dear, I’m so sorry; I know several people with gout (including our friend Little SD) and hear it’s no picnic. Eat more kale.


  5. I too have suffered from this crippling affliction, yes even at my tender age, right toe, it started not long after taking apple cider vinegar tablets, needless to say, when I stopped taking them it went away. I would rather have gout than the dropsy, another Dickensian ailment. I would like a ride on man 5 please.


  6. Gout? Ouch!

    It is apparently something to do with diet (it’s a build-up of uric acid in a joint), and our own NHS advises you should avoid offal such as kidneys or liver, seafood, fatty foods, sugary drinks and alcohol.

    It says nothing about penis. Thankfully.



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