Looking back on the days leading up to my health bump in the road, it’s easy to see where I went wrong. Hell, I saw I was going wrong even as I was doing it; I just didn’t stop. Little things like staying in bed 24 hours a day for days in a row, emerging only to pee and eat whatever cookies I could find in the pantry. Yes, I knew I was not actually a vampire, but I seemed to think living like one might be a viable concept. It wasn’t.
As I crept back into the world of the Not Sick as a Sick Dog, I googled what to eat for a life with a touchy gallbladder. Of course, the first item is leafy green vegetables. No matter what problem you Google ( gall bladder, early menopause, how to file your taxes, how to escape the country after you file your own taxes) leafy greens always show up as a solution. Obviously the industrial military spinach complex has penetrated the search engine universe.
But I asked, they answered and so I have been following their advice with salads at every meal and just tonight, kale. I was so impressed with myself, I texted Diane to brag about it. She replied asking how I prepared it. Isn’t that adorable? Thinking that I might actually be cooking once again. I replied, crushing her sad little dreams, that it was the side with my Chicken Parmigiana at the Firewood Cafe, an old favorite.
In the four months I’ve been in this apartment I have turned on the stove twice, both ties to boil water. The second time, having learned from the disastrous first time, only after I washed all the cat hair off. The stove has one of those totally smooth porcelain tops which is easy to clean, but which collects dust and cat hair. If you don’t wash all the debris off before firing that mother up, the stench of burning cat fur will fill the place and stay with you. At low times, I think I can still smell it.
Anyway, my diet is better, I’m leaving the house for a couple of walks every day and I feel much better. Food and exercise, who knew?

Because this could await for you in the outside environs. Who knows?